Musings 11092025

Staying Bitter With Anita Liberty

Well hello there! I’m writing to you from my home office, looking out onto a damp and blustery street in Brooklyn. Police cars blare their sirens heading east and the bright and fiery November leaves waltz cozily onto the wet, black road.

I never know what to do when I have unexpected free time. I try to resist the urge to be productive, to fill up each moment, each hour with purpose. Before coming home, after leaving coffee (and a cornetto!) with a friend, I made myself walk to a nearby garden and just sit… Yes I doom scrolled for a bit on my phone, but with each burst of wind, I did my best to turn the screen over and relish in the delights of the rain to come. The soft, cool breeze rustling up the plants at my side. And the sound of damp gravel crushing beneath my feet... Too — when I finally came home, the kitchen needing a once over, I instead walked to my office, where, now here, I’ve decided to pull the trigger on a promise made two Musings ago.

Remember that desk series? Where I wanted to put my camera to use? Well after sending out a wee email blast to my fellow creatives and like minded friends, I had the pleasure of visiting Suzanne Weber one sleepy September afternoon, my underutilized Sony Alpha 7RIII by my side, in her open and airy loft to talk about life, craft, and what it means to live as a professional creative. And before I forget, shoutout to Suzanne’s hilarious substack “Stay Bitter.” You’ll definitely want to subscribe!¹

Note: I am not a journalist despite once aspirations to be. My questions are in bold with Suzanne’s answers below at times trimmed or [ edited ] for clarity, context, and accuracy.

How would you describe your work?

Satire slash comedy. I started my writing career by performing under the guise of a character: Anita Liberty. Anita is a performance poet who’s just gotten dumped by her boyfriend Mitchell for a woman named Heather and decides to devote her entire career to humiliating Mitchell in public.

Over the years, after performing as much as possible in NY and LA, I was able to get the attention of the publishing industry. Once my first book was published, How To Heal The Hurt By Hating, film interest followed. But I wanted TV. I held out until I was offered a deal for both the film and television adaptation of HTHTHBH with me attached to write both scripts. Neither project got made. But [ by ] then I was sort of known by network comedy execs, so I was able to continue to get pilot deals. I started writing pilot after pilot. Nothing ever got produced. Finally [ I ] moved into staffing which was awesome.² For a while. Especially when I was hired at the Producer level for the Lizzie McGuire reboot. But Disney screwed that pooch and the plug got pulled right before the Covid lockdown. Blah. Blah. Blah. I had been living out in LA, but moved back to NYC with my husband and dogs in 2022. My kid was in college in Vermont and being out in LA without them felt kinda silly.

Like a lot of writers I know, I have felt really depressed about work and my writing. I am trying to return to the basics and remember what I like about writing. I like to make people laugh. I am trying something different right now — cartooning. More like storytelling with pictures. I’ve always been a doodler but [ in truth ] I [ only ] started drawing in earnest a year ago. It was a 30-Day challenge (shout out to Wendy Mac!) that really got me into it. Then I started taking classes (shout out to Hillary Fitzgerald Campbell!). And reading a ton of graphic memoirs and trying to build a practice (shout out to Lynda Barry and her book, Making Comics!).

What project are you most proud of?

My second book. How To Stay Bitter Through The Happiest Times Of Your Life. I’m most proud of it because the first book felt like a fluke and the fact that I had enough material for a second book, and the fact that when I sold it, the publisher, Villard³, decided to reissue the first book with a matching cover, it felt like a big deal. It felt real. The second book allowed me to do what I wanted to do in TV, which was show the evolution of a person — like, What happens when someone who has built her brand on being bitter and angry falls in love and gets married? I just had a really good time writing that book.

More broadly, the thing I am most proud of is coming up with the character of Anita, landing on that voice as a writer, a voice through which I knew I could reliably find what was funny about the most difficult things about life — that felt like magic.

When did you know you were a storyteller?

Such an interesting question! I love connecting with people, talking with people, and I love embellishing stories to make them funnier.⁴ I’m someone where something will happen to me that is moderately amusing and I’ll tell the story to my husband, he’ll laugh, and I’ll be like, “Oh, there’s something interesting there.” Then I’ll tell a friend. And, in telling the story again, it will reveal a different interesting something. So, by the time I feel I have gotten my worth out of a story, my husband will have heard it maybe six or seven times but there’s something different each time and it’s like workshopping. I like engaging an audience. Even when it’s just my husband, my friends, or the UPS guy.

As a kid, I don’t think I was a light and happy-go-lucky child. I was filled with fury — well, maybe not fury — but an energy I couldn’t quite understand. My dad was really funny. Dry. Dark. A little mean. The humor in my house when I was growing up was very sophisticated, which meant I was left out until I was like 10 or 11. It took me a while to understand… but once I knew I could make my dad laugh, I was hooked.

What [ content ] are you consuming now?

I’m an avid reader, so lots of books constantly. I read a lot on my e-reader and it just kind of turns into one big book. So I never remember anything.

On the TV side, I am into two things. One is Girls. Because of Lena Dunham’s new show⁵, my kid (now graduated from college) went back and started watching Girls. So when J— was home this summer, we would hang out and and watch together. [ When Girls originally aired ] I watched the first season or two. But I wasn’t hooked immediately because for one thing I wasn’t in my twenties and why did (inaudible comedic sound, whark?!) ⁶ she [ Lena ] get to have a show and I (well, really Anita) didn’t. I was too resentful. Also I did not love what seemed like stunt casting to me (like Zosia Mamet).⁷ I had so many barriers up when it was first on, but watching it now?! It’s fucking amazing!

The humor is incredible. There were several times when J— and I would have to pause the TV because we were laughing so hard. There’s this one line where someone describes the character played by Ebon what’s-his-name-from-The-Bear⁸ as, “He looks like someone in the Pacific Northwest knit a man.” And I was like WHAT! That’s an incredible descriptor. So I went back with this renewed appreciation for how sharp the show was and how self-mocking and self-aware it was and how it was truly satire. She’s [ Lena’s ] making fun of herself and her generation. I don’t believe that anything the audience feels about her characters is something that Lena hadn’t already anticipated. And I think that’s incredible as a creator.

My second [ TV ] thing: Taskmaster. There are a ton of seasons. It’s on YouTube. It’s a British game show with comedians. Escapist. Easy. Funny. Something about it relives me of anxiety and the stress of the day.

Who inspired you to live your current [ creative ] life?

Uniquely for a woman of my age and generation, I grew up with a working mother, which was rare in and of itself, but my mom — Idelle Weber — was an artist and made her living as an artist. It was her actual job. She made money. She had success. And I think that made me realize it was possible to live a life like that. So, I think mostly my mom inspired me.

I would say in terms of my voice, and finding the voice of Anita Liberty, my brother gave me a book by Italo Calvino — If On A Winter’s Night A Traveler — when I was in high school. It’s so meta and self-reflective and funny. I was taken by that. That really shaped early Anita Liberty. And my humor in general.

What is something that is unexpected in this choice to live or have this career as a working artist?

Lack of money?

[ insert us both bursting out into laughter, doubling over on her soft, plush sofa ] [ after a beat of silent, stoic contemplation ]

I want to frame this within [ the context of ] the work I’ve done in the ‘traditional industry.’ I’d say the amount that you have to keep convincing people of your worth has been surprising to me. This idea that you can establish yourself as a writer, a good writer, and sell things reliably, and be successful in the eyes of the industry, but every year everyone is like, What else do you got? There’s nothing wrong with asking for new work or new ideas — but this feeling of having to constantly prove that you have something different to offer than the original thing you offered that got you recognition in the first place… It’s not about resting on your laurels, but there is just this constant barrage of — what else what else what else. It’s like Groundhog Day. The industry makes you constantly feel like you are starting at square one every time and never like you are progressing. And I don’t want that answer to sound naive because this is true in every business. Especially in the arts. You have to keep creating and producing and proving yourself and I just… it’s just this thing where I thought if I got to a certain point [ that ] I’d get to relax a little bit and that’s just not true. But, also maybe, the truth is I never got to that certain point. Now I’m sad.⁹

Anything you wish you knew about life as a working artist or anything you wish you were asked more about?

I think it’s really difficult as a writer or artist when you’re the guardian of your own time. To put that boundary up and have people respect it. I don’t have a nine-to-five job. I don’t have an office. Obviously people can call me at three o’clock in the afternoon and I will pick up and jabber for an hour because I love procrastinating but at times it’s like no, I do have to work. And maybe that means doing laundry or playing a game on my phone, but my brain is still working on my writing.

There’s this idea that when you’re a freelancer you’re at everyone’s beck and call. And sometimes people don’t understand that you need an entire day free to get an hour’s worth of writing done.¹⁰ So it’s hard to protect that space for myself. But also, I love procrastinating, so don’t not call me! I still want people to call me. Or at least text to see if I’m free.

Thank you Suzanne for your warmth, insight, and wit! If you’re reading this and what to be featured ‘at your desk,’ or know someone who ought to be featured, drop a comment below or let me know! Would love to keep this up. My camera needs the exercise ;D

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As always, stay safe and sane out there. Know your rights. And stay bitter.

m.

1. One of my favorite posts: Remembering Mark.

2. Before I met Suzanne, I was a huge fan of Disney’s Andi Mack, which, Suzanne staffed on.

3. An imprint of Penguin Random House.

4. At this point we’re both laughing because same gurl same.

5. Netflix’s Too Much starring Megan Stalter.

6. We’re both laughing again because not sure how I’d eventually transcribe this infectiously funny sound.

7. Zosia’s character ended up being my favorite despite my loathe-watching of the show.

8. Emmy winner Evan Moss-Bachrach. His “Forks” episode from The Bear remains a favorite.

9. At this point I’m realizing I’m not alone in this thought. That while I’m exhausted and unsettled in this cold truth, there’s community in this discomfort. But it still doesn’t make it okay.

10. Facts.